Bitter !

Too many distractions
that do not really need any attention

I thought I am thorough with boys
treating me like one of their toys

Beyond all the bitterness and pains
There is only one question remains

The other half piece of mine
Will I ever find one ???

Missouri oh Missouri

Visiting a little town of Davis
brings me back good memories
from my old town in Missouri

Seeing a little snow
in Lake Tahoe
reminds me of those heavy snow
back in the day in CoMO

Next year I'm gonna bring somebody
Seeing the pretty autumn in Missouri
where all the colorful leaves look pretty

Another heart broken

She's a heart breaker
She's a trouble maker
Deep inside her heart
She knows she hurts him really bad

She is unsure if she should regret
all the things she's ever said
or did in the past

She wished she could disappear
or the wind could wash away their tears
She wished time could stop
for her to figure out what is love

She could only wish ...

============================

What a busy weekend !

Fun weekend
Spent with a bunch of friends

Starting with bowling
I was unsure what I was doing
just threw the ball & saw where it's going
Thus my score kept downgrading

Brownies & ice cream was the next stop
Followed by poker & 'golf'

The next day I explored town
with 4 St.Louis' clowns
Sightseeing, dining, karaoke & pool were fun

California Adventure was unforgetable
For me, roller coaster was never do-able
yet I finally rode it twice
I took it as an "overcoming fear" exercise

Now I am sitting here
barely have anymore energy

What a busy weekend !
Tiring yet fun !

The Lesson from The OC

Last night episode of the OC
has just confirmed my theory
Ok, see...

You may call me ignorant
but all the trouble began
When Marisa tries to protect Ryan
or when they both love each other too much

The question is though ,
How much love is TOO MUCH ???
Good question. I do not know.
Anyone, anyone ???

Am I still a sanguine ?

I am eager to see
if I have changed my personality
from a sanguine into a melancholy

So I took this personality test
which result I could pretty much guessed

Melancholy:6
Phlegmatic:3
Sanguine:24
Choleric:7

I'm still very much a sanguine !!!

Suicidal Thought: A Battle Inside

Tomorrow
I'll be gone
coz there is none
to hope for

WHY

WHY
would I exist
if the only thing I did
is to make others sick

WHY
would I be here
if the only things appear
are tears and fear

I am a trash
I'd disappear like ash
from this world
where I do not belong

===================

We Only Need One Day

Yesterday we were strangers
Standing in two different corners
Hesitated to say hi to each other

Today we are a couple
Sharing laugh and giggle
Finding each other in times of struggle

Tomorrow we never know
if this feeling will perish or grow

We only need one day
for a big huge change
We only need one day
ONLY ONE ...

================================

Masih sendu ga niii, Bud ? Hehe...

Is this the answer ?

... Neither death nor life
... Neither angels nor demons
... Neither the present nor the future
... Nor any powers
... Neither height nor depth
... Nor anything else in all creation

... will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord

(Rm 8:38-39)

Is this the answer to all my confusion ???

How do you define "cool" ?

I wanna be a cool a gal.
No. No. That doesn't sound right.
I want PEOPLE TO THINK I am cool.

Whoa, whoa. Hold on.
I do not even know what "cool" really means.
So I look around.

The drunk girl.
The social butterfly.
The grunge or gothic looking.
The "I am going to skip class" girl.
The pot-addict, smoker, & drug-addict.
Are they cool ???
If they are not, why do people love them ???
And why do they not love me ???
Am I not cool ???

Then I am thinking.
Maybe it's ok to skip class once in a while
although there is no reason to.
Maybe it's ok to be a party animal
especially when it's thrown by the cool gal
Maybe it's ok to try the extreme : smoking pot or trying drugs.

Then I am thinking again.
I do not think these stuffs are cool.
Thus, it remains a BIG question mark :
Am I cool ???

The sinner's prayer

I've walked away
and fallen from grace
I've run away
take me back to Your embrace

I've lived a life
of lies and denials

I've been someone
who I know I am not

I am confused
I am distracted
I am lost
Completely screwed up

I did not follow the correct guide
and fallen from grace
Now I need a light
to take me back to the right place

BLUE

Feeling BLUE
Although there's no reason to

Feeling BLUE
Like there's nobody to talk to

Feeling BLUE
Feeling BLUE
Feeling BLUE

Do not know what to do
There is really no clue

Whose birthday is it anyway ?

Met this fellow a few weeks ago
I called him "Glowing Boy"
despite that's not how he wants to be called

His birthday is coming
To him it seems so exciting
He tried to make people aware
of the big day in his own way

The age of eighteen
is what he will be leaving
Making me wondering
He's so lucky being a teen

========================